Wednesday, April 15, 2009

3 Months

Today marks 3 months since Emma's birth and passing. Time really does go by quickly. I still haven't visited Emma's grave site. We couldn't put a headstone in until April, because the ground is oftentimes frozen before then, but we still haven't done it. I think that's the reason why I haven't visited though. I think I need something tangible to look at and to touch. Not just some grass and thinking that she's somewhere around.

However, since it is her 3 month birthday, I want to come up with some traditions that our family can incorporate to remember Emma by. Here are a few suggestions I've gotten from other people:
  • go to the grave and sing Christmas carols around Christmas
  • hike the "Y" (it's a big Y on a mountain here) on the birthday (I don't think this one would work for Emma though because of the time of year)
  • every year on the birthday, do some charitable act related to how old that child would be (i.e. at one year - donate 12 mo. girl clothing to a shelter, at 6 year - donate books to a local elementary school, etc.)

We're still trying to figure out what works and what would be meaningful to us. But we're also not very creative people, so if you have any ideas, please share them with us!


The Horn Family said...

On Cosette's birthday we are going to plant a tree every year. We are also going to have all the close family members get together on her birthday and have a birthday celebration for her. We're going to talk about our favorite things about her, the faces she made, and just talk about whatever we can remember about her. I've heard some people write notes to those they've lost and put them in balloons and let them go outside, in hopes that the person receives the notes in Heaven.

Sara said...

My first son, Nicholas, was stillborn on May 8, 2002. The day after we had his graveside services, my husband and I and any family in the area went to where we had buried him and we released white balloons into the air. But, before releasing the balloons, we each wrote a message to Nicholas and sent the messages to heaven attached to the balloons.

I wanted to have some kind of tradition to do each year on Nicholas' birthday, so we started letting off white balloons on his birth-day with special notes written to him. We release the same amount of balloons for how many years it has been. (So, this year we will release 7 balloons because he was stillborn 7 years ago.)

We now have 4 children. I love doing this with them! It helps them know and remember their brother that they never knew here on Earth. And it also lets me share my testimony with them. That I KNOW we will see Nicholas again and he will always be a part of our eternal family!

We live in Idaho, and Nicholas was buried in Springville, UT. So, we don't get a chance to see his grave very often. But, whenever we are in town to visit family, we always try to make a trip to see Nicholas' grave!

Holly said...

I think that's great to make a new tradition. I like the idea of donating to some cause in her memory. In this way, it helps other people.

Tara Bishop said...

I love the charitable act one. Because that way you are not only blessing your family life by growing closer but you are definitely blessing the lives of the other children who may be struggling in their own life.

Nicole said...

We also write notes to Logan and send them up with balloons. We also raise money and walk for the march of dimes every year for "Team Logan".

We have a birthday cake every year on his birthday.

Topping Family said...

I havent lost any children but i think the ballons, and celbrateing the birthday with a cake is a wonderful idea. Something that the kids can really get into

Kayleen said...

Time does fly...I can't believe it was 3 months ago that we held that sweet little body and felt her and Our Fathers spirit so close. It is worth remembering one way or another.

Chantelle said...

My baby brother lived about an hour. Whenever we have family pictures taken, my mom brings this little brown bunny - it represents Jared's place in our family. He counts and so does Emma.

Celia said...

I love the charitable acts remembrance. What a wonderful way to remember Emma and also give back in her name! That is truly a legacy. Also, why couldn't you release balloons as well? There is nothing saying that you have to limit yourself to just any one thing when it comes to remembering your precious little girl Emma! I say do something charitable and release balloons with messages to her! Make it a party & a picnic where you spend the day with the family as you prepare to release those balloons.

I hope you come up with something that will be meaningful to you. Because, in the end, it has to matter to you and no one else. As long as what you do is what you truly want to do to remember your daughter by then it can't be wrong!